reflection on beginnings 10.18

hearing the stories on thursday was intense. i admire those who were able to go up and speak about those issues...they made themselves so vulnerable to hundreds of strangers. that's pretty cool.
the issue i most related to was body image. i think that for most girls it's an issue. i was a chunky kid until high school and was so self conscious. after the chunky stage i was really thin...then i found a happy medium. but even since finding a healthy weight range it's never perfect, but i've learned to love myself anyway.
seeing ourselves as god sees us can save us all. if we look at our bodies as gifts given to us by god, whether we have been abused by others or judged by ourselves, i think it's easier to be satisfied and accept.
so...here's one of those awkward endings to a blog, because i'm not really sure how to close.

Alcohol

I've seen the effect of alcohol. I've never experienced it firsthand, but I've definitely been close to it. I'd say 90% of exchange students spend a lot of time on their exchanges drunk. They're given this freedom...or at least they can take that freedom when they're technically not supposed to...and they go crazy with it.
I've held hair back for people when they threw up. I've thrown way bags of puke. I've searched for someone running around drunk in the rain at 3 in the morning. I've been scared for someone's life when they were passed out. It's not fun stuff.
I've seen how foolish people act and I've heard the stupid things people say. I've seen the other side of so many personalities and I've seen will break down.
Alcohol's a serious thing and I really wish it would be treated as such.

Goals

wow. what a broad topic.

there's a lot that i want to get done, but it's not any specific thing that i'd set aside just for here at apu. some of what i want is a continuation of what i'm already doing, other parts are new. either way, here they are:

stay fluent in hungarian and keep in touch with my hungarian families and friends. as a learner, i'd say this won't be too hard. i know how much work i put into learning the language, and now that i've come this far i still only want to know more. also, my woo strength may play a part here. i have connections with my hungarian friends that i definitely want to keep and build on.

run regularly. it makes me feel better and definitely keeps my stress and exhaustion down. the best shot at using this strength will probably be woo, also. the connections that i've made here with people who run will keep me accountable.

STOP PROCRASTINATING!!! my learner strenth may encourage me on this one. now that i recognize this as a strenth i'll (hopefully) learn how to use it to discipline myself and encourage myself to go further.